Privacy, terms & refunds
Last updated 13 October 2026
Who we are
pimpofseo.com (“Pimp of SEO”, “we”) is a parody site that also sells two real services: the SEO Pimp Mastermind and the Verbal SEO Audit Roast. Questions about anything on this page: pimp@pimpofseo.com.
Privacy
What we collect
- Contact form: your name, email, website, what you’re interested in, your message, and the country your request came from.
- Purchases: your name, email, phone number and, for a roast, the website you want roasted. Payments are processed by Stripe. We never see or store your card number.
- Visits: anonymous, cookie-free traffic statistics from Cloudflare Web Analytics. No advertising or tracking cookies.
How we use it
Only to reply to you, deliver what you bought, and keep records for tax and accounting. We don’t sell, rent or share your information, except with the services that run the site and payments (Cloudflare and Stripe) and when the law requires it.
Your choices
Email pimp@pimpofseo.com to see, correct or delete the information we hold about you. We keep purchase records as long as tax law requires, and delete contact-form messages on request.
Terms
- It’s parody. The jokes, titles, rankings and screenshots on this site are satire. Nothing on it is a promise of rankings, traffic or results.
- The services are real. The SEO Pimp Mastermind ($5,000) is access to Ty Stav’s mastermind. The Verbal SEO Audit Roast ($20) is a recorded verbal review of the SEO of the website you submit, sent to the email you gave at checkout.
- Roasts are opinions. A roast is one person’s honest, unfiltered opinion of a website’s SEO. It isn’t a guarantee, legal advice or a statement of fact about the site’s owner. Only submit websites you own or have permission to have reviewed, or that you’re gifting a roast to.
- No guarantees. SEO results depend on many things nobody controls, Google included. The services are provided as is, and our total liability is limited to what you paid.
Refunds
A pimp never gives it back. Except here:
- Verbal SEO Audit Roast: if your roast hasn’t been delivered within 7 days of purchase, you get a full refund. Once it’s delivered, it’s final. You knew you had it coming.
- SEO Pimp Mastermind: all sales are final once access has been given. If we can’t give you a seat, you get a full refund.
- Charged twice or by mistake? Email pimp@pimpofseo.com and we’ll fix it.